“Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.” – Dalai Lama
Everyone wants to be more confident but with the lack of in depth advice about this important topic many people get lost along the way and waste their time applying advice that never works.
One of the most important factors that affect a person’s self confidence is the way he sees events or the way he interprets them.
If a person interpreted an event incorrectly he might mistakenly lower his self-confidence without noticing.
Now if that same person went on interpreting different life events in his own incorrect way he will end up without any self-confidence.
On the other hand when someone sees these events correctly he will either increase his self-confidence or he won’t get affected by the negative situation he has been through.
Incorrect Perception lowers self-confidence
I went out with some of my friends who didn’t know each other.
One of them was extremely shy and I was aware of this fact.
This girl rarely talked because she wasn’t sure whether people will like her or not.
The guys who were with me that day were too anxious because they thought that this girl doesn’t want to talk because she doesn’t like them.
As a result they backed off, talked very little and didn’t try to open any conversations.
The girl on the other hand saw this as a sign of lack of acceptance so she become even shyer and didn’t talk at all.
Now all of those people saw the event incorrectly, and as a result they all felt bad about themselves, while if any of them had the chance to get into the minds of others, he would have discovered that the problem is with their perception and not with the situation itself.
So why do we see situations incorrectly ?
Now the question is why do people see situations in a different way?
The reason this happens is that those people interpret these situations based on their own belief systems.
If for example a woman believes that all men are cheaters, which is a false belief, then she will interpret some signs that have no meaning as if they are signs of cheating.
On the other hand a woman who doesn’t have such a belief will never see things that way.
So the first factor that affects the way we interpret situations is our beliefs.
In short false beliefs make us see a distorted reality. It’s a perception deception.
The second factor that affects the way we give meanings to events is low self-esteem.
If someone believes that he is less worthy than others then he will seek clues to prove his beliefs true and he will succeed in finding such proofs by twisting his perception.
For example if someone didn’t smile while saying hi to that person then he will assume that this person hates him or doesn’t love him.
If you want to interpret such situations correctly and if you want to see the real reality then you must work on getting rid of your false beliefs and improving your self-esteem.
This Guest post was written by M.Farouk Radwan The founder 2knowmyself.com
Everyone wants more self confidence but how do you do it?
What is self confidence and how do you strengthen and build your self confidence?
Self confidence in a nutshell is a sense of certainty in your self and your abilities.
While we may not be confident in everything that we do just getting by is not enough.
Self confident people are the leaders and innovators in our society.
They take risks where others will not. They go for it when others are too afraid.
The truth is that just 1% of people have total self confidence in themselves.
I want that number to rise don’t you?
Self confident people don’t fear failure because they view/define failure as a learning opportunity, do you?
Or do you fear failure?
>>>Dr Robert Anthony has a great program to create the feeling of self confidence in you. The Self Confidence Creator.