Cultivating a Real Relationship with Yourself

My belief is that communication is the best way to create strong relationships.” – Jada Pinkett Smith

Maintaining relationships can be a tough thing to do.

I always wanted to have a good relationship with others but found it difficult, cumbersome and tiresome to maintain them.

We all have experienced relationships and lingering wounds from past relationships may still haunt us to this day.

I’m not just talking about intimate relationships either.

Relationships with jobs, friends, habits, and more importantly with ourselves.


What Is A Relationship

Relationships are a way of relating to one another including ourselves.

Relationships are defined as:

The way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.

Sometimes we can change the way that we relate to one another or ourselves but often times we don’t because we lack the discipline needed to do so.

We had relationship models that we learned and developed in early childhood with our parents or guardians.

Unknowingly we go into every new relationship with the same mind-model/pattern unconsciously.

This pretty much guarantees that we will re-create the relationship experience all over again.

If you had a mutually beneficial and respectful relationship with your parents than I would have to believe that your adult relationships are also similar in that regard.

Most likely you would seek out these types of relationships again because they are comforting to you.

But if your relationship with your parents was “weak” in many areas than so would your adult relationships and your experience would reflect or mirror this.

Most people can handle emotional stressors like loss of or low-income, jobs, home environment , but if our relationships are suffering boy can it do a doozie on our well-being.

Remember I am also talking about our relationship with ourselves in this post.

You must first learn to love yourself first unconditionally before you will ever have a chance at successfully loving another.

How to love yourself is easy. See yourself as perfect already and know that you are worthy and capable of giving and receiving love.



Lack Of Focus

Lack of focus or importance in our relationship with ourselves is the main reason that we are unhappy.

We get so caught up in doing and pleasing others, well at least I did, that we neglect the things that we need most to be happy with ourselves.

It seems to me that it is more acceptable to please others than it is to please ourselves. Have you experienced this as well?

Betraying yourself in order not to betray another is still betrayal, in fact it is the ultimate betrayal. It’s the betrayal of the self– Neale Donald Walsch

It’s easy to get caught up in the “doing” of life and forget to keep up a healthy relationship with ourselves.

Also the demands of work, family, and social obligations will leave even less room to take care and love ourselves.

Battling the inner demons that are preventing us from being who we are is our greatest obstacle in life to personal freedom and joy.

Funny quote about home

Important Question For You

Let me ask you a question.

Who is the most important person in the world?

Your answer will decide how healthy your relationship with yourself is.

Your answer to this question must be “Me”. You are the most important person in the world.

This is not meant to sound selfish or egotistical by any means.

You didn’t incarnate in a human body on earth to make yourself become less than who you really.

And you also didn’t intend to mitigate your importance or contribution to this world that we share.

No one owns planet earth, but we do owe it to her and ourselves, to contribute to life in meaningful ways.

How can we do that if we don’t recognize that everyone alive is important and is needed in their own unique and creative way?

If you met my family

The Answer

By turning ourselves inside out and letting it all hang out.

What I mean by this is that what you are really feeling and thinking inside must be made present on the outside world. As above, so below.

The mask that we have all been wearing is getting heavy and it’s time that we begin to take it off once and for all.

Think of Captain Jack Sparrow from The Pirates Of The Caribbean movies. He is who he is. No mask is being worn by Captain Jack. He’s brave when he’s brave, and he’s cowardly when he’s cowardly.

So go for it. Show the world who you really are, love yourself unconditionally  and don’t hold anything back.

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